Oh, rejection!
We all face it. Even published authors. Even Jane Yolen!
This is how I consider rejections now, after seven years in the business:
But when you’re still unpublished, rejections somehow hurt more.
Besides applying a baking-powder-and-vinegar salve three times daily, how do you ease the sting?
Welcome author Emma Walton Hamilton. She will teach you what those rejections really mean and how you can use them to your advantage.
Manuscripts are like children–we birth them, nurture them, pour our heart and soul into helping them be the best they can be. Then we send them into the world, praying they have what it takes to succeed. If we’re lucky, and we’ve done our job right (we hope), they’ll fly. But inevitably, we–and they–must muddle through setbacks and tests of resolve before they can claim their place in the world.
One of those setbacks is rejection. Manuscript rejections are an unavoidable part of the writing life…but that doesn’t mean they aren’t painful. It also doesn’t mean they can’t be converted into learning opportunities. This is such an important distinction that Julie Hedlund and I devote an entire module to “Interpreting Rejections and Dealing with Feedback” in our new Complete Picture Book Submissions System, which we created to support picture book authors through every step of the submissions process, since we know firsthand how challenging that process can be. (Check out Julie’s recent blog post exposing one of her earliest query letters.)
Converting the experience of rejection from personally devastating to professionally useful begins with bearing a few important things in mind:
- Manuscripts get rejected, not writers themselves. Meaning, this is not about you–it’s about the manuscript not being a right fit with that agent or publisher.
- It’s business–not personal. The reasons for the rejection may in fact have less to do with the quality of your writing and more to do with the focus of the agent or publisher at this time, or the limitations of their current resources.
- Hundreds of famous children’s authors received rejection letters on what later became their most successful manuscripts, including Dr. Seuss, J.K Rowling, Madeline L’Engle, Stephanie Meyer, Meg Cabot, C.S. Lewis and many, many more. (Check out Literary Rejections if you don’t believe me, or could use a little company for that misery.)
- The wrong fit at one place can be the right fit somewhere else. Moreover, that somewhere else will serve you and your manuscript better than the first place would have, because they “got it.”
- There may be a gift accompanying the rejection at best, insight into how to improve your manuscript or query, and maximize your chances of nailing the next submission; and at least, the opportunity to strengthen your commitment and resolve. (An old acting teacher of mine used to say, “Never mind the talent, do you have the tenacity?” This is just as relevant for writers.)
Maybe the rejection includes some feedback worth considering (although it’s important to distinguish between meaningful feedback and form letter feedback, which is something else we focus on in the Complete Picture Book Submissions System… it’s easy to confuse the two.) But even without feedback, every rejection is an opportunity to revisit your query and/or your manuscript. Is it really submission-ready? Is it structurally sound, formatted correctly, typo-free? Is every word essential?
Finally, it’s important to take care of yourself during this time. Sending your creative work into the world can make you highly vulnerable, and it’s easy to lose perspective. Do whatever you do to nurture and reinvigorate yourself: take walks, meditate, see a movie, go shopping, get a massage. Seek the company and communion of fellow writers for support, learning and perspective. Most of all, keep writing–generate new material to keep building your portfolio, stay in the flow, and avoid having all your eggs in one basket. That is, after all, the real work of being a writer.
Emma Walton Hamilton is a best-selling children’s book author, editor and writing coach. With her mother, actress/author Julie Andrews, Emma has co-authored over thirty children’s books, seven of which have been on the NY Times Bestseller list, including The Very Fairy Princess series (#1 Bestseller), Julie Andrews Collection of Poems, Songs and Lullabies, the Dumpy the Dump Truck series, Simeon’s Gift, The Great American Mousical, and Thanks to You–Wisdom from Mother and Child. Emma’s own book, RAISING BOOKWORMS: Getting Kids Reading for Pleasure and Empowerment, premiered as a #1 best-seller on Amazon in the literacy category and won a Parent’s Choice Gold Medal.
19 comments
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March 3, 2015 at 9:50 am
Sue Heavenrich
Editors and agents are people, too. And they are subjective. Just the way it is…. thanks for the reminder to pick ourselves up, grab a piece of chocolate, and keep moving on.
March 3, 2015 at 11:00 am
mariagianferrari
That’s right! Pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off & start on over again 🙂 Thanks, Emma!!
March 3, 2015 at 11:21 am
marlainagray
I just got another rejection last night, so I appreciate reading this now. 🙂 On to the next submission …
March 3, 2015 at 12:32 pm
Stephanie Geckle (@SPGeckle)
I’ll think of them as hurdles in a track and field event. LET’S DO THIS!!!
March 3, 2015 at 1:55 pm
michaelwaynebooks
Reading 1 star reviews of amazing books gives me a pick me up. 🙂
March 3, 2015 at 3:02 pm
Sydney O'Neill
Thank you, Emma. I followed the Literary Rejections link. It’s interesting that some books didn’t sell well with the first publisher but then sold very well with a different publisher. It gives new meaning to “not right for us.”
March 3, 2015 at 5:38 pm
Elizabeth Martin
Most helpful blog. A feeling of community and eating chocolate keeps one on course.
March 3, 2015 at 6:10 pm
Matt Tesoriero
Always good to hear this on “repeat”. It’s almost — just expect rejection as part of the process. Expect it. Count on it. And just keep writing and editing and submitting. Shut off the rejection emotion button!!
March 3, 2015 at 7:12 pm
saundrasstudio
Reblogged this on saundra's studio and commented:
So many wonderful authors that got so many rejections before being published. Don’t give up!
March 4, 2015 at 6:50 pm
Patricia Toht
#4 is so true! At the SCBWI conference in LA this year, Beach Lane Book’s Allyn Johnston told us that she took a pass on Pat Zeitlow Miller’s SOPHIE’S SQUASH. She said she just didn’t connect with it. She also said that, had she tried to go ahead without that connection, it wouldn’t be the magical book it is today.
March 5, 2015 at 1:17 pm
Ali Pichardo
Knowing so many wonderful authors have been rejected keeps me going. When my manuscripts are accepted I’ll be in good company.I look at each rejection as one step closer to my acceptance. Thanks for keeping our spirits up.
March 6, 2015 at 11:39 am
Kay Winters
What a helpful blog! I have to remember that my friend once sent in a manuscript 102 times. In fact, at the end, she sent it back to the very house that rejected it and another editor not only bought it,but the sequel is coming out this fall. But the day the rejection arrives… it is hard to ignore that small voice saying…
It’s not any good. You are not any good. And the same is true of a rotten review!
March 6, 2015 at 7:04 pm
aliciaminor
Editors won’t have jobs if there are no rejections at all so however frustrating and painful it is, let’s take it as it is. Meanwhile, let’s keep writing and maybe one day, we’ll succeed after so many or less rejections. That’s all there is to it.
March 7, 2015 at 9:56 am
Summer Pharr
Food for thought — although notice the best selling author who wrote it has a famous mother
Sent from my iPad
March 7, 2015 at 5:59 pm
hellerj
Thls is a helpful essay. I have revised my manuscripts and later gotten them published by editors who had rejected my manuscript years earlier. Having a writers group helps me to rework my stories, essays, and poems until they are ready for publication. My forthcoming middle-grade chapter book for children, The Passover Surprise, was revised at least 10 times before being accepted for publication by Fictive Press.
Best wishes!
Janet Ruth Heller, Ph.D.
Author of the poetry books Exodus (WordTech Editions, 2014), Folk Concert: Changing Times (Anaphora Literary Press, 2012) and Traffic Stop (Finishing Line Press, 2011), the scholarly book Coleridge, Lamb, Hazlitt, and the Reader of Drama (University of Missouri Press, 1990), and the award-winning book for kids about bullying, How the Moon Regained Her Shape (Arbordale, 2006). Forthcoming middle-grade book for kids: The Passover Surprise (Fictive Press, 2015).
My websites are http://www.janetruthheller.com/ and http://wattpad.com/JanetRuthHeller
March 9, 2015 at 5:45 pm
Stephen S. Martin
I have come to the conclusion to not try to tailor a story or MS to an agent or editor I would like to have. Eventually “my story” will find “my agent” and good things will happen. Rejections are a part of life.
March 16, 2015 at 11:22 pm
Anita
Yes, those great writers got rejected, but the point is they were all published and some after under 50 rejections. Years of rejection, over 200, hurt. No matter how many accolades, great reviews from Kirkus, even by major newspapers my self published book gets, the rejection of it by the experts remains a fact that it was not good enough and a self published book will never receive the same respect as a published book. For many of us, we will never be able to see ourselves as writers until a publisher gives our book validity.
November 30, 2015 at 12:00 pm
tinawissner
Thanks for advice and your webinar. I learned a lot:)
January 25, 2018 at 8:38 pm
Shauna Woodall
As I read about rejection, I think, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming …”