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Hey, Tara! Thanks for letting me share about my Stinky Stench!

(Umm, P.U., but OK…?)

Over the last year and a half—ever since first book LADY PANCAKE AND SIR FRENCH TOAST was released—a small handful of bookstores around the country reached out to me asking if I’d be interested in visiting to do readings and signings.

For those in and around New England (my home), I tried to make it happen. But occasionally, a store far out of driving distance asked. And while I was honored, I didn’t have any imminent plans to travel to New Orleans or St. Louis or Los Angeles*.

Well, word got back to my amazing publicity and marketing team at Sterling Publishing. In preparation for the release of the sequel, they offered to send me on a short tour to celebrate THE CASE OF THE STINKY STENCH and they even worked it out that I could visit a bunch of those stores that had contacted me!

So for the first two weeks of May I traveled from Boston to Allentown, PA to Asheville, NC to New Orleans to Kalamazoo, MI taking a detoured route through Indiana and Illinois to St. Louis, then finishing up in Baltimore.

I had seven bookstore events: The Novel Neighbor, Octavia Books, Spellbound Children’s Bookshop, Bookbug, The Ivy Bookshop, and two Barnes & Nobles (Allentown, PA and Portage, MI).

At Bookbug they made these cupcakes:

And I got to hang out with a bunch of nErDcampMI friends.

At the Novel Neighbor, they ordered special Flapjacks Lip Gloss:

At The Ivy Bookshop, it was standing room only!

But the best part was that I got to visit 19 schools in those ten school days.

Some days I visited three different schools. Other days I’d stay at a single school all day and do multiple presentations.

Sometimes I’d be reading to a single class or grade at a time. Other times I presented to entire elementary schools—from 600 students in the gym to 200 students in the auditorium to 150 students in the library to 20 preschoolers in the art room—I tried it all.

One school got creative with life-size minecraft and Pirasaurs!

Sometimes I had slides and a microphone.

Other times I had neither. Luckily I’m not a diva …yet (traveling with a personal masseuse is totally acceptable, right?).

One school that I had Skyped with previously got me to read my poem about my cat that poops all over the house.

So I’d like to thank Sterling for everything! From the tour all the way back to taking a risk on the slush pile submission in 2013 that was Lady Pancake & Sir French Toast (yes, it was a slush pile submission – Sterling accepts unsolicited submissions via snail mail – see guidelines here).

*Don’t worry, Los Angeles. I promise I’ll get out to you eventually!

Josh is giving away YOUR CHOICE:

  • EITHER a personalized signed copy of THE CASE OF THE STINKY STENCH
  • OR a written critique of your picture book manuscript (Josh values this at an estimated $1 billion)

Leave one comment below to enter. A winner will be randomly selected soon!

Josh Funk writes silly stories and somehow tricks people into publishing them as picture books – such as Lady Pancake & Sir French Toast and its sequel The Case of the Stinky Stench along with Pirasaurs!, Dear Dragon, It’s Not Jack and the Beanstalk (9.19.17), Albie Newton (Spring 2018), Lost in the Library: A Story of Patience and Fortitude (2018), and more coming soon!

Josh is a board member of The Writers’ Loft in Sherborn, MA and was the co-coordinator of the 2016 and 2017 New England Regional SCBWI Conferences. He’s written a free 12-Step Guide to Writing Picture Books available on his website here.

Josh grew up in New England and studied Computer Science in school. Today, he still lives in New England and when not writing Java code or Python scripts, he drinks Java coffee and writes picture book manuscripts.

Josh is terrible at writing bios, so please help fill in the blanks. Josh enjoys _______ during ________ and has always loved __________. He has played ____________ since age __ and his biggest fear in life is being eaten by a __________.

Find out more about Josh at his website joshfunkbooks.com and on Twitter at @joshfunkbooks.

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I am thrilled to be writing this blog post.

bored

Wait a second…

That’s the worst opening, isn’t it?

Let me explain.

powersaleswritingBack when I wrote marketing copy, sales letters and press releases for a living, I bought POWER SALES WRITING by Sue Hershkowitz-Coore, an eye-opening guide and the most useful business book I’ve ever read. Good business requires sharp writing.

In the book, Hershkowitz-Coore tells marketing writers to stop being thrilled all the time. Sure, you are thrilled to announce a deal, launch a product or publish a book. But why should your audience be thrilled? What’s in it for them? No one is going to be thrilled simply because you are (except for your mother).

thumbsup

The point? Stop writing sales pitches from your point of view and write from the target audience’s POV. Make your audience thrilled. Give them something to get excited about.

I receive dozens of unsolicited book review pitches a week. There are too many, so I take a simple approach to weeding them out. Those that use “I am thrilled” to open the pitch get deleted. (Sorry.) With that introduction, I know they haven’t considered my blog readers’ point of view.

I never forgot that thrilling lesson. Yes, I’m sometimes still too thrilled for my own good. I want friends to be happy for me, so I will occasionally toot my own flugelhorn. But then I remember what my Nana used to say: “Well, your arms are long enough to pat yourself on the back.” (Yeah, Nana could be harsh.) In a way, Nan was trying to teach me the same lesson as Hershkowitz-Coore. No one is going to be as thrilled as you are, so you’d better make your news worthwhile to others.

I am thrilled to be finished writing this blog post…because I hope it has helped you.

My debut book is still 9 months away, but what I’m hearing from friends is that the promotion process is fraught with dilemmas and doubts. Yes, we managed to write a book, submit it and get it accepted for publication, BUT WILL ANYONE BUY IT? And what if some bookstores don’t even carry it?

Well, don’t worry. Ryan Gosling is here again today to calm your fears.

As a children's book author and mother of two, I'm pushing a stroller along the path to publication. I collect shiny doodads on the journey and share them here. You've found a kidlit treasure box.

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My Picture Books

COMING SOON:

THE WHIZBANG WORDBOOK
illustrator TBA
Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
Summer/Fall 2018

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